We Need Each Other

We need each other. Men and Women. One cannot exist without the other. Thus, there shouldn’t be a battle between the sexes, so much as team work with the two. But ideas that gained traction; took flight; and gave birth to: laws, religious practices, stigmas, and major inequality between the sexes have bred a great divid between the sexes across the world.

The solution? It’s here. Encourage, love, support, cultivate, and adore each other as you would yourself. But yet, women are still fighting battles in the workplace, for their bodies, and respect in general. Things are looking up, the next era and generation will be so much better off given the pioneers of yesterday and today being brave enough to demand change.

The evolution must continue with embodying certain values in all of ourselves. And, no one should be exempt from guilt for perpetuating old concepts of gender roles. Once parents and communities start raising little girls to compete for accomplishments the same way boys are taught, then we will see equality, so long as this is done without any judgements about women desiring to be creators, leaders, or taking control of their own sexuality.

The healing process has started, and should be protected in order for the process to return the desired result. Equality.

American Rape Culture

Rape is not permissible under any circumstances. It is against the law; it’s harmful and scarring; and there are no available justifications for it…ever. But, why is rape so prevalent (with the understanding that rape is not so nicely categorized)? There is a spectrum of rape, although we must accept that rape cannot be qualified. It’s rape when charges are filed, when they aren’t, when no one knows, and when there isn’t media attention surrounding any one incident. It’s all rape–including, and especially, the statutory variety.

When it comes down to it, there aren’t any viable explanations or reasoning a person can give to justify why rape occurs; from the forceful taking of another’s body to the mental manipulation, by way of age disparity, drugs, or pressure, to achieve a similar result. But, why does it keep happening? Is it because our justice system has failed to make rapists pay, by demonizing the behavior of the victims, in courtrooms? And, there doesn’t seem to be any end to this wide-spread spectrum of rape in sight either. It could be that once the taboo surrounding sex is removed from the American culture, then rape in America can subside.

Yes, it could be that the sex culture in America has led to a rape culture. There are so many conflicting ideologies surrounding sex laid over the stigmas that come as a result of sex or sexual choices, coupled with very real consequences of the same, such as venereal disease and unwanted pregnancy. Outside of that, humans are beings that desire to reproduce and share affection by way of sex. But yet, Americans vilify sex through norms and religion. A girl has sex, without being married and she’s a whore? A man likes other men and has sex with them, so that man deserves to be beat ,tortured, killed, or can’t go to church? Having sex with a person outside of your race or ethnic identity leads to painful peer-scrutiny and being label or effectively banished from a group? Teenagers have sex, girl is impregnated, then her parents send her away because giving birth to another human is embarrassing? People watch pornography (a billion dollar industry) and it is considered shameful? ¬†We are to blame. We’ve created a mess out of something so simple, which may be the cause of such a culture of rape and the false accusations of rape as well. There are some people who have used rape accusations offensively to not live up to their actions, such as cheaters and those having sex outside of their racial identity, or as an excuse for why they are pregnant, because it means you had sex and did it shamefully. Then, consider some people have rape fantasies. Explain that?

When will it be okay to admit that men and women want to have sex, and sex with others, and as much as the other gender? And, men and women want to have sex with whomever arouses them. What arouses them is based on a myriad of factors. Presently, men and women are bombarded with an image of sex and beauty, which could reasonably result in people desiring something in the likeness of those images. Women like men want to be desired. Women like men want to have sex. But, by nature women have to be more selective; and by culture they have to be more discerning than men. Simultaneously women don’t want to be emotionally hurt, labeled by the public, or have an undesirable result. Many women could find that not having sex is easier, especially when not being ready to handle the accompanying factors.

Men live in a culture where their selectivity doesn’t matter as much which potentially puts them in more situations where they find it hard (no puns here) to control themselves. Some men are influenced by the idea of sex making them men, impressing friends, wanting a particular experience, and the overbearing natural desire to copulate. As life teaches a boy or man, they find that aggressiveness is a viable means to be successful in any conquest, including sex, which leads them to taking something hoping to capture those fleeting moments of anticipated happiness.

Thus, you have a major conflict between sexes. Sexes that often times are required to mate for the sake of progeny. Two competing wills meet. As a result, people have designed and have used drugs to alter the atmosphere or environment. Women are fed birth control from the time they have their “period” so that they won’t become pregnant. Clearly, there’s a war on nature. Once men and women make the connection that birth controls says that having children are bad, you also believe that sex is too, even when that’s been redundantly pushed through various outlets. It could be baffling to a person that something so inherent in a person is so damned by the culture. It makes sense to create behavioral mechanisms in reaction to this seemingly damning situation. Rape being one of them. Blame the rapist, but the culture deserves some responsibility too.